There Once was a Man...

There once was a man from Dunfries,
Who caught quite a bad case of Fleas.
He scratched and he cried,
But whatever he tried,
The bugs were all quite hard to please.

There once was a man from Seattle,
Who was known 'cause his dentures did rattle.
It was quite a mistake,
To order the steak,
Trying to talk o'er the noise was a battle.

There once was a gal in Maine,
Whose life had become such a strain.
A short length of rope,
A suicide note,
She had found her solution to pain.

There once was a boy in Berlin,
Who awoke to a bed full of skin.
He peeled and he poked,
And this isn't a joke,
Without it he was ever so thin.

There once was a man in Japan,
Who felt that he needed a tan.
He hired a bed,
But he didn't turn red,
He knew when to quit with the plan.