Don't Trust a 2 Star Paella.

Is this the only place they could get? It's a fucking dump.

I don't even remember why I said I'd come on this trip... But I can't get out of it now, no matter how much I bitch and moan...

Great.

At least the flight went smoothly. But it's not like it was long or anything, and I don't think Madrid is a huge terrorist target.

What it is however is a tourist trap. Sooo many pickpockets. Maybe that's just my paranoia but... I swear someone went for my bag as soon as we were out of the airport.

Well... The hotal Toromolinos seems... earthy. Gotta put a positive spin on things like this. Oh look... the special is the paella... how... cliched. But YUMMY!

Oh god. I said yummy out loud.

Now they know I'm pissed off. But what's new.

Only thing worse than a school reunion is a school reunion combined with an under-quality holiday.

These can't be the people I grew up with.

Tom, Sarah, Frankie and George got old. Real old. Tommy got a beer gut. Sarah got a scar! I think I'm the only normal one... Whatever that is in this "Brave new world".

Time to check in I guess...

* * * * *

I want to go home.

The room is tiny and filthy. A cleaner left mine as I came, and it was fucking attrocious.

He SAID he was a cleaner...

And now this. A paella that looks like it was made about 2 weeks ago. Oh, and a salad. A big Salad. I saw someone throwing veg into a lawnmower when I got here. No need to wonder why now.

If I don't get to somewhere with a clean floor and good food soon, I think I'll kill myself. I'd even settle for a Mcdonalds. It's that bad.

God this smells horrible. It's either this or there's a gas leak.

Down the hatch.

* * * * *

Huurgh...

OhgodI'mgonnabe...

*HORK*

I can't...

Can... Breathe...

Haagh...

*Thumph*

* * * * *

Hah!

Where... What happened?

At least I'm feeling better...

That's right... That fucking food. I'm gonna sue them into the next millenium.

...God I'm thirsty. At least I checked the water, and it seems pretty...

W...What's wrong with my eyes.

I have brown eyes, not... Not Purple.

Violet, not purple.

Gah! My hands!

Violet rings around my hands... My finger...

They feel like they're on fire.

...This is a joke. A bloody joke. I was moaning too much, so they all...

...They won't wash off. The water is ice cold...

Or are my hands... Sensitive. Overly sensitive. I can feel everything... I...

I'm gonna be sick...

*SHINK!*

The fucking toilet! It just... Fell apart!

No... Where i put my hands on it... They slid off, I had no grip...

The rings...

The cuts are where the rings were...

...

What could have...

I refuse to believe that paella could do this. No matter how toxic.

I'm... A superhero. I could be a superhero!

...

If I weren't kneeling down in toilet water and shattered bowl.

And I have 13 days left in this... This fucking country.

Great.