The Legend of Kilkassie.

There once was a town. But it was more than that - it was a town of giants. All of the people were as high as the sky.

One day, a woman came to the town. She went to see the king. She asked the king for entrace to the mountains, which the giants had sworn to protect. The king, mighty and tall, said that none may enter but the gods of the earth. Not even he could see inside of the mountain.

The woman, perterbed, asked once more, warning the king of his greed. The king, in earnest said he could not let her enter.

She asked one last time, but the king said no once more.

So the woman, beautiful and powerful, walked from the palace and into the centre of town. And she did the most wonderous thing.

She began to sing.

And the children of the town ran to her, sitting all around her in the centre of town. She sang the most beautiful song, never stopping for 2 whole days.

And then she began to walk. She walked all over town, the children following her everywhere she went.

She left town, still singing all the while. And the children went with her.

Now, for a giant to have children is a wonderous event - since giants can live for hundreds of years. A giant can only have children once in their whole life. This is the way the gods of the earth made them.

All the children had gone from the town. And their parents were all very sad. Their humongous tears swept through the town like wild rivers, never ending.

That is how we came to know the Razorback River.

It came to pass, that hundreds of years later, a man came to the giant's sorrow.

He went to the king, ancient and mighty, and asked why the giants lament so.

The king told their story, promising anything they could give him if they found their children.

So the man agreed. And he went into the world.

He went to the furthest point of the world and consulted the Scrier of Damedly as to where he should go. The Scrier told him he did not know, as it was beyond his time. He did tell him were he could find out though.

And so, the man went where he was told to go. He went to the other end of the world, to Coralok, where the Dark Mage Yassirus lived in his Coral tower. He climbed the walls of the citadel, and fought off the forces within. His body, beaten and broken, managed to reach the window of the tower. The Mage saw the bravery of the young man, and took pity on him.

The Mage told him that the woman does indeed still live, as do the children of the giants, and that they were under the world as they spoke.

The man thanked the dark one, and took his leave, jumping into the dark ocean below.

The man reached his final destination, the world's cape - the vast cliff that separates the world from the darkness. From the top of the cape, he heard the winds of change from below him. On the wind were notes of a song.

This is how we came to know the World Song.

The man climbed down the face of the cliffs, touching the vastness of eternity. He reached a cave, and the song was coming from within. So the man entered the world.

It was dark inside the world. There is no light within the world, so he was forced to walk, trusting his senses for direction. The song became louder, and stronger, and began to sap his will. He began to feel tired, and could not control his body. He reached the light at the end of the tunnel, and before him stood the woman, beautiful and ever young. He passed into the world of sleep.

Within his dreams he fell forever. The god of sleep, Kanastus, appeared before him in all of his magnificence. He shone like the stars themselves and was as vast as the night sky. He told the man his time was over, but had enough power left to give him a gift, for he saw his cause was good. The god, merciful and proud, caught the man in his hands and threw him back up to the waking world.

This is how we came to know the godmarked.

When he awoke, the man found he was a prisoner of the woman. He lay in her bed, nude as the day he was born. The woman stood before him and took him into her bosom. They experienced the throes of life and death within and without each other.

The man, resisting her siren spell, reached out from his prison and clutched for his weapon. He plunged his weapon deeply into her spasming chest, splitting her breast in two. The dark blood flowed from within her, and from their union and her fluid came the monsters we know today.

The woman dead, he took himself from her bed and saw the children of the giants. They were free from her spell as well. They asked the man where they were and if he could take them home. The man agreed and set off. And the children went with him.

The forced their way out of the world itself, their desire empowering their blows to the crust.

And this is how we came to know the Nest of Evils, so close to the edge of eternity.

The man brought his quarry back to their city, the rivers stopping for the briefest moment.

The king, bountiful and joyous, told the man the could have whatever his heart desired that they could give.

The man asked to enter the mountain.

The king, shocked, asked him if he could want anything else, for even that is beyond their power.

The man asked again, and the king refused.

The man asked one last time, and the king saw the mark of the god upon his hand. He had no choice but to give him what he desired, but drew no ill will towards him.

And so the man entered the mountain.

And that is the last time the world ever saw him.

And that, is how we came to know Kilkassie, Wandering traveller, Slayer of the siren Vinnoria, Conqueror of Corolok, and true King of the Gods.

But there is another story... A story of a princess. A princess from a frozen kingdom. A princess with a destiny beyond her own imagining.

But that is for another day.

That comment hurt me. Did I mention that I cried?

Why are you crying, Joel?

...I'm not crying...

Yes you are.

...No I'm not...

Yes you are. What made you cry this time?

...Nothing...

Would a lollipop make you tell me?

...Yes.

There we go. Now what's the matter?

...Some guy cut me up in traffic this morning.

And you thought about it all day?

...No...Yes.

You have to let these things go...

...But he was so inconsiderate!

This is New York - people do it all the time.

I know... But it still hurts.

So is that it?

...No.

*Sigh* Alright, what else happened?

The machine ate my card.

Well, I can understand being upset about that.

I use that loyalty card a lot... Used now...

Loyalty card?

...My "Hot-doggin'" loyalty card - I was 2 dogs away from a free milkshake...

What kind of machine would even need a loyalty card?!

...Well... It was a dog more than a machine...

...I'm going to leave now if that's all...

One more thing...

...Right.

It's Sara, she got hurt pretty bad...

Oh god... How badly? I haven't even met her...

She's in pretty bad shape...

What do the doctors say?

...She hasn't gone to the doctors.

If she's hurt she needs to go!

But they'll laugh if I take her!

Not if she's injured! Besides, if you love her, you should take her.

...Alright... But she's not gonna like it. I was just gonna repair her myself with a puncture repair kit.

...Goodbye Joel.

The man who spoke to the world.

A man walks through the wood.

Half way through he meets a green giant.

He asks the giant which way he should go.

The giant says nothing but points east.

So the man does so.

While walking across the cliff, the man met a herd of white horses.

He asked them where he should go.

They neigh not, but throw themselves inland.

So the man does so.

In the city, the man met a group of robots.

They were of all different colours and sizes.

He asked them where to go.

They said nothing.

No pointing.

No direction.

The man felt their sorrow and stayed with them.

I still don't know what happened to him. 

That man so in touch with the world.

Occasionally I see him.

Sat at the bottom of the garden.

I ask him to stay a while longer.

So the man does so.

Dear John.

I'm afraid this isn't working. None of it. Not any more.

I accepted that you have flaws - who doesn't? But it was the stuff you ACTIVELY hid from me that makes this both an easy and hard decision to make.

First, the other woman. I know about Karen. I know about your secret meeting when you were "Working". I just don't understand what I was doing wrong.

Second. The... bizarre fetishes. Roleplay is the furthest I'll go - I have explicitly told you this. The subtle hints were not appreciated. The cactus, latex pig suit, washing up liquid, mashing machine SHELL and the pink fluffy hangman's noose will be returned in the condition they were found.

Third. I don't mind being filmed in the bedroom. What I mind is you redistributing the film to your friends. What perturbs me even more is the fact that you didn't just give it out. You set up a make-shift penny arcade to display "What the Butthole saw.".

Lastly, Your pets need to go. Please come and pick them, their belongings and their CHILDREN up. I don't appreciate iguana spawning across my sofa, let alone next to my head at night.

Sincerely,

Jane. 

A Dark Reflection.

You realise what you've done, right?

Of course. You don't take shit like that lightly.

Right. So what'cha gonna do now?

Lay low for a while. See if I can get an alibi from Grace.

She'll toss you out again.

No she won't. She loves me.

Sure. And the Pope is Jewish.

Look, she knows the score now - I'm straight.

So what does that make this?

...A slip up.

A premeditated slip up. A cold and calculating slip up.

Fine. What do you say I do?

The laying low is fine. But I think you need a back up plan, just in case.

Like what?

Maybe purchasing a weapon of some kind?

That seems a little much.

It's either that or keep the knife.

...That isn't a good idea. You know it isn't.

Yeah, so what? I don't see you bringing much to the table.

Alright... How about getting out of the country while I can?

Nah. They'll catch you in a heartbeat once they find the genetic evidence.

Genetic evidence? I was careful!

Not careful enough. 

Shit!

Calm down... There's a way out.

If you say suicide I'm going to be very upset.

No. Why not frame someone else?

You said there was genetic data.

Say it's your knife. You never found it for days - until the police pull it out of a bush near the crime scene.

...Who though?

Who else? Harriet. She HATED John. More than you ever could.

Right... Then how did she get in?

I dunno. And neither do you. She could have gotten it anytime.

Right...

You sound pensive. I don't like that.

It's not the right thing to do.

Says the murdering nutball.

You were there too.

You can't prove that!

I can. Somehow. If I go down you're coming with me.

Alright, alright... How about... Hm.

Can't think of anything can you, Mr. Smarty pants.

I'm just as clueless as you are, buddy-boy.

There's no other way. I have to get out of the country.

To where?

Mexico?

Why Mexico?

Nice place, Mexico. 

Is that all?!

No. It's easier to see an international policeman coming in the desert.

Ah. I see. Seems good on paper.

On paper?

It's like I said. They'll be able to track you down, no matter from how far away you see them.

From the tickets?

That, the credit cards and the CCTV.

Hm. I could use cash.

Or Grace's credit card, which you still have I take it.

Yeah. Good idea.

And you could keep out of the range of the cameras.

Exactly.

So have we decided?

Certainly. I'm going to pack!

Wait! Don't forget your mirror!

Oh right! I'd be aimless without you!

A Reinactment of my Recent Beard Trimming.

Ugh... Fuckin' beard.

*ZUUUURM*

Hm. Doesn't look great. This razor isn't the best but I can't exactly go out now.

*ZUUUURM*

Nope.

*ZUUUURM*

Now I've done too much, it looks absolutely awful now. Moreso than before.

Right - Head off.

*ZUUUURM*

Wish it hadn't of come to this. 3 options now:

1 - Nude. Pro - Youthful. Con - Double Chin.
2 - Landing strip. Pro - Neat and easy to maintain. Con - Looks like a lesbian's genitals.
3 - Chin strap. Pro - Really neat. Con - Hard to maintain the constant details.

Ah screw it - 3. It'll be like sandpaper tomorrow anyway.

*ZZUUUUUUUURRMM*

There.

Uh-oh. Wayward hairs.

Fu- Great. I may as well leave it for a few hours, it'll drive me nuts anyway.

OH SHIT A DRAGON!

*RAARGH!*

To me, Hanalain! To me, enchanted sword!

*VRING!*

Take this, you red mother-

*CHUNK!*

There. Now to drink it's blood and gain eternal lif- Oh.

Wayward hair.

Urrgh.

The Adventures of Captain Lasso and his Faithful Sidekick, Mox the Martian!

We open on our heroes relaxing on the set of "Dueling Pistols at Dawn", a rip roaring western movie, starring Frank Hardchester, aka Captain Lasso.

Geez Cap, I've never been on the set of a real life movie before!

Well Billy, what do you think of it all?!

I don't know what to say! It's one thing being in on your seret but Hollywood is another thing...

It's not technically Hollywood, William.

Oh Mox, you're just an alien, you don't get it. Wherever there are movies being made, it's all Hollywood!

An interesting notion, but false.

*VREEN VREEN VREEN VREEN VREEN*

Oh boy! the Lassotron has found us a criminal!

That's right Billy. Now stay here and cover for me if the director comes looking for his leading man! Come on, Mox! We have crime to tie down!

...

Aw... I wanted to go too.

* * * * *

*CALLING ALL CARS! CALLING ALL CARS! THE ONE MAN CRIME WAVE AND RUBBERHOSE HAVE HIT ALL OF THE BANKS IN THE FINANCIAL DISTRICT! WE NEED EVERY MAN WE CAN GET DOWN ONTO 4TH AND ROSELL ASAP!*

YAHAHAHAHA! This is the life, eh hosey?!

A-yup. Sure is, CW. Just as long as the duper-heroes don't come and rain on our parade.

That's our cue, Mox!

Egad! It's Capt. Lasso and Mox the Martian!

Oh dear dear dear! Whadda we do, CW?!

Split up my lanky legged friend, meet up at the hideout!

Quick Cap! The perpetrators are getting away!

I know, Mox - You take Rubberhose, and I'll take the crime wave!

* * * * *

Hup. A-yup. I think I lost them. Gotta get back to da hideout!

Not so fast, you mono-chrome miscreant!

Uh-oh!

Have at you!

...What?!

Hyuk hyuk hyuk! Hard t'hit a guy who can stretch like a rubber band, ain't it, Martian?!

Gah! He's caught me in his billowing folds of cartoonish catastrophy... Ack! He's crushing me!

You'll make a real purdy puddle o' goo when ahm done with ya!

...Got to act fast. Have to concentrate... on... STRENGTH!

Whut?! How'd you bulk out of mah body?!

Easy - when you're a martian metamorph! Hya!

Urgh!!!

That's one down - I wonder how Cap is doing...

* * * * *

You'll never take me in, Lasso - How can you catch a man who can multiply at the drop of a hat?!

The devil! where there was one - 10 now stand! I have to take out the real one!

Hyah!

Ah! the fiend - he has a switchblade. I have to trust my instincts...

...

There! Go Lasso, go!

Hah! The lasso - it's followin' me! Ack!

Got you! Now we play the waiting game for the sarge and his boys.

Curse you, Lasso! CURSE YOU!

From the files of Minerva Sharp.

Mervin, Mallory
POWER: Class-3
Control over plant life in immediate range.
*NOTE* Loyal to the system. Possible successor.

Dinford, Robert
POWER: Class-2/3
Psychometry
*NOTE* Backlash can occur in the presence of other psychics.

Broune, Gregory
POWER: Class-4
Living sunspot. Able to generate intense heat and project it.
*NOTE* Reckless, hotheaded.

Undron, Harriet
POWER: Class-3
Able to merge with shadows. Unable to in total darkness.
*NOTE* Prone to escape attempts. Tighted security accordingly.

King, Moses
POWER: Class-1/2
Living Lockpick.
*NOTE* Useless. Dismiss when able.

Haines, Frederick
POWER: Class-4
Acidic bile. Able to consume any matter for sustainence.
*NOTE* Glass cell.

Furee, Daniel
POWER: Class-3
Able to take on the properties of touched matter.
*NOTE* Loyal, but cannot fully control his gift.

Miles, Alice
POWER: Class-3/4
Generates psycho-sensitive "Chaff". Confusion, blanks and unconciousness are all documented effects.
*NOTE* Power affects all, non-selective.

Ford, Abraham
POWER: Class-4/5
Invulnerable to harm. Posesses super-human strength.
*NOTE* Weak willed, prone to fixations on females.

Westhow, Violet
POWER: Class-3/4
Can animate the inanimate. Objects up to her own size and weight only.
*NOTE* Shows sociopathic tendancies.

These children all show the signs of great things. They just need to get over their fears and childish nature. Time will tell.

INCIDENT LOG

12/12/74 - Harriet tried to escape again. Placed in the dark room. No accomplices.

24/12/74 - Alice lost control. Something about Santa Claus. No Casualties.

25/12/74 - Violet. This girl shows incredible malice towards the others. She pushed Daniel into the christmas tree. We spent hours collecting him up. She brought the turkey back to life. She manipulated Abraham into starting a fight with Frederick.
Violet in isolation. Put forward for P.N.T. trials.

31/12/74 - Harriet escaped again. During the party for the staff. Abe was an accomplice. He shows a bond with her and Mallory. Both put into isolation.

14/02/75 - Abe snapped at me. Unprovoked. Into isolation.

20/03/75 - Control tests began. Children shipped out to training locations. Harriet tried to escape.

24/03/75 - GERMANY. Robert in critical condition. Tutor missing.

02/04/75 - King dismissed. Kept on roll. Sent to foster family in Harlem, NY.
- Corandine, Gordon aquired.

Conrandine, Gordon
POWER: Class-3
Able to access a dimension outside of our own through his body.
*NOTE* Hammerspace, like a bugs bunny cartoon. Access from attached clothing.

20/04/75 - Children return. Lapse in measure - lose one truck to Haines' bile.

06/06/75 - The Garden Incident. Violet in critical condition. Abe in isolation. Alice in coma. Mallory showed great strength of character, along with Broune.

22/07/75 - Alice awakes from coma. Physical therapy for Violet concludes.

29/07/75 - Gordon found hung in his room. Children not informed.

03/08/75 - Furee assaulted. No known attacker. Abe suspected. Isolation.

18/08/75 - Furee informs me of Violet's cruelty to the others. I suspect there is more to recent events that meets the eye. Violet under constant surveilance from McHann.

20/08/75 - McHann reports Violet walking. Impossible since the accident in the garden. Though it does make sense in my head.

29/08/75 - Harriet missing. No signs of escape.
- Later found in garage, in the shadow of a truck. Said she was scared of something.

14/09/75 - Violet caught trying to steal a knife from the kitchen. Sent to Vermont facility.

30/10/75 - Abe berzerk. Something about Alice's relocation to England. Isolation.

31/10/75 - Abe escaped, through pure force. Harriet missing as well. It's all gone wrong. 5 of the 10 remain loyal. Time to inform them of our true mission.

LOG END.

Daylight.

Been down for too long...

The sun hurts my eyes...

I need to find her...

She... Will know what to do.

* * * * *

Morning Emil.

Good Morning Ms. Mervin.

Emil, I've told you. Call me Mallory. Now, any new arrivals?

A class 4, and two class 2 individuals.

Class 4? That's a rarity. Give me the 2's.

First is Dorian, Francis. Able to see through walls.

X-ray vision?

More like echo-location, from what we've seen.

Right. And the girl?

Evans, Joan. Secretes a chemical what can confuse people.

That's a class 2?

She has to apply it to the head of a person for it to work.

Ah, I see. Well, Mr. Dorian will be a useful field agent. Pair Miss Evans with a physical agent, have them as back-up. Have they been briefed?

Not as yet, we were waiting for you.

Right. How about the class 4?

Forrester, William. A ferronic entity.

Ferronic?

Ah... Made of metal. Or at least has a shell of it over his own body.

Hm.

He seems to be able to eat anything as well. We went through a couple of chairs before we found that one out.

I get it. It adds to the mass of the shell. Where was he?

One of our informants gave us a tip. He was buried in the middle of a forest.

How did he know?

No idea. I try not to ask.

Could be a forced mutation or evolution, upon burial. Run a toxicity test to check for-

-Already done. Not toxic residue. We thought natural mutation as well.

Keep him under observation. How is his temperment?

He was in shock at how long he was under. Been there since the 60's he says. Other than that, he's fine.

Good.

...Mallory?

Yes?

There was one more thing.

Oh?

D-Wing. It was... broken into, last night.

...How?

Straight through the wall evidently.

Anything missing?

No. The path of destruction ended rather abruptly. All the cameras got was a shape. Small, but strong, he was able to break the wall, and through several of the doors to the research labs.

Are you sure nothing was taken?

Positive. All projects and equipment accounted for.

...

If you ask me. It was looking for something. It was slow, methodical.

Hm... Bulk up security. It could be back.

Already done.

Good. Something's screwy... Can't put my finger on it though. Emil, get me a tracking team.

...I don't think it's such a good idea. This thing was able to both breach the security without making a sound, and then break through the reinforced walls.

Trust me. Just send them out - capture, not kill.

...Right. I'll send you the data as they go. What will you do.

This is priority one now. I need to meet with the senior staff and other controllers.

Only Mr. Dinford and Mr. Broune are in the facility at the moment. As for staff, they sould be along when you need them.

Right. Get the boys up - I'll see them first.

* * * * *

Run...

Run...

They'll be after me soon enough...

She'll see to that...

But she won't see me coming, oh no...

Not at all...

* * * * *

Dinford. Broune.

Can we dispense with the formalities, Mallory? You know Me and Robbie well enough.

...Fine, Gregory.

This is about the break in?

Yes. The... intruder was looking for something.

Oh? What?

If I knew, I'd tell you. He seemed to know the grounds pretty well though, went straight to the research labs.

Industrial espionage?

He wasn't quiet. I'd think that if he'd snuck in. He was an animal. Robbie - I need you to use your gift.

...Fine...

Please, go over to the wing and find out all you can.

...Won'tbeeasy...Lotofhistory...

I know, but please try.

...Alright...I'll begoing...

...

Poor guy. Never the same since Auschwitz. Never send a psych to a fucking locus for misery.

...Broune. Don't bring up the past.

Sorry Mal.

...

Hm.

What?

Just a thought. What was there years ago?

Where?

D-Wing. It was the old administrative offices wasn't it?

Yes. Where Sharp used to be. What's your point, Gregory?

Maybe this thing was going on old info, or had an older map.

It had business with Sharp? She's been dead for 15 years.

That's just what I think. It's a long shot, but... If the well dries up, you have to look for other places with water.

I wasn't dismissing it. It just seems strange. She had a lot of enemies though. We all did - but she took the brunt of it.

Hm. Now I see why you don't want to bring up the past. I just got shivers down my spine thinking about it.

...

*BZZURT*

The search team is out. Emil sent beta team and gamma.

Hm. Can't see it being much help though. If it has work to do or a mission it'll be-

*VREEN! VREEN!*

Emil, what's going on?

*It's Mr. Dinford - he's having a seizure, or a fit, I don't know. A med team is on the way.*

We'll be right down.

* * * * *

Hunter. Hunted...

She'll never see it coming.

Never.

* * * * *

Robbie...

We don't have much to go on. Could have been a psychic thing, that's not my area. He was doing his thing on the lab, and then... He was down. He was yelling in pain, they had to give him morphine to relax his limbs for the cart.

He say anything important?

No, he was screaming most of the time. He screamed for the two of you. And some of the other partners. Undron, King, Haines, Abe, Furee, Miles-

Abe?

Abe, one of the names, yes.

There isn't a senior called Abe.

...Yes, there was.

Broune?

...It's him, Mal. He's back.

Wha... Abe? We thought...

That's what "She" told us.

Oh god...

Sir? Ma'am?

Abe. Poor Abe. It all makes sense. The strength. The stealth. The... Animalism.

What do we do, Mal?

...We go and meet him.

A Haiku or Two. It's Good for the Soul You Know. So here is the Post.

There is no way out.
The exit sign has fallen.
I'm totally lost.

Standing on the cliff.
I feel the touch of nature.
I'm utterly nude.

The tree in the wind.
Swaying with the stalwart breeze.
Refuses to break.

I feel great today.
I woke up when the sun rose.
The light of the day.

Over hill and dale.
I run with great urgency.
Being chased by cows.

Flipped.

*CHING*

Heads. Another slice of toast. White or brown?

*CHING*

Brown. Not my favourite, but what can you do. Butter or Jam?

*CHING*

Butter. Jam isn't great on brown toast.

...

Right, shower done - What to wear...

*CHING*

Black. Always in fashion. Waistcoat?

*CHING*

Hm. You're right. It looks like a muggy day. Could be humid. Not good for waistcoats. Guess I'll go semi-formal.

*CHING*

Oh. Guess not. Semi-casual?

*CHING*

Good. Not much difference anyway.

...

Meeting Jane in an hour...

*CHING*

Restaurant. Nice change of scenery. A cafe would just be...

*CHING*

Too informal. Flowers?

*CHING*

Yep. May as well get her favourite kind.

*CHING*

Or not.

...

Jane! Over here!

Michael!

*CHING*

Woah, just a handshake today.

...I thought we'd been over this. That isn't healthy.

It's fun! Anyway, I'm the one who's writing the feature, I'm 3 months in and I can't stop now.

*CHING*

Nope, can't stop now.

...Fine. Let's just get lunch. Where do you fancy?

I have reservations.

Reservations? Mike, I'm in my work clothes - I can't be seen anywhere like this.

Not just anywhere, The "Maison Fortose".

How did you get reservations for there?!

*CHING*

...It's better if you don't know.

For god's sake...

...

Good afternoon sir and madam, I'm Jervais and I'll be your waiter today. Would you like to order?

Yes, I'll have the chicken. No starter for me.

And for you sir?

...

Sir?

*CHING*

I'll have the Duck in peppered mushroom sauce, along with the prawn coctail to start.

Certainly sir.

...

Why did you order a starter? Now it's going to take twice as long for the mains. I only have an hour's lunch.

That's plenty of time. Just relax.

Well, it is nice here... No matter how you got the reservations.

*CHING*

*CHING*

*CHING*

Will you stop that?

Sorry, it just happens out of habit now.

...Look. I want to say somethig.

*CHING*

Go on.

...I love you.

And I yo-

-But I've had enough. This bloody coin business has to stop.

It's fine.

No, it really isn't. It's creepy. You don't have any control over it.

Bullshit, I do. I could stop any time I want. I made a commitment.

Going on a coin flip for a full year to "Test your luck". It isn't luck - it's lazy. You're 3 months in - how many times have you flipped that coin?

...I don't know.

Exactly - Think how many times you'll do it in 365 days.

*CHING*

...I'm happy.

What?

I'm happy. Happier than I've ever been. I would have never made reservations like this before the coin. I wouldn't have booked holidays for us in the bahamas.

The bahamas?!

Happy birthday. And I would have just been one of these hopeless fucking mortals without it. I go where it takes me, and i'm happier for it.

Mortals? ...You think you're a god?

No... I just have a divine purpose.

Oh, so you're divine?! Right.

What are you doing? Give it back!

No. I'm making a flip of my own. Heads I go, Tails I stay.

No, please, don't do this.

*TING!*

...Tails.

Not easy is it? And you have to stick to it. No matter what. Even if it's something you really want to do. I've passed up so many opportunities.

...Then quit. Just do what you like.

I'd love to... But I said I'd do the story.

Well, I'm going to do what I like. As soon as we finish here. I don't want to see you anymore.

...

*CHING*

Fine.

...

...

...

Did you both enjoy your meal?

...Sure.

...It was lovely.

Very good, here's the bill.

...I'll get it.

Okay. I'll do the tip.

*CHING*

Nah. I have a better idea.

*CHINK!*

I can fob Lewis off. Tell him I did 6 months but had to quit. He doesn't see me all the time anyway. Any coin looks like the other.

...I'm glad. I've got to get back to work. I'll see you at home!

Sure! Bye.

...

Any old coin looks like another.

*CHING*

Don't Trust a 2 Star Paella.

Is this the only place they could get? It's a fucking dump.

I don't even remember why I said I'd come on this trip... But I can't get out of it now, no matter how much I bitch and moan...

Great.

At least the flight went smoothly. But it's not like it was long or anything, and I don't think Madrid is a huge terrorist target.

What it is however is a tourist trap. Sooo many pickpockets. Maybe that's just my paranoia but... I swear someone went for my bag as soon as we were out of the airport.

Well... The hotal Toromolinos seems... earthy. Gotta put a positive spin on things like this. Oh look... the special is the paella... how... cliched. But YUMMY!

Oh god. I said yummy out loud.

Now they know I'm pissed off. But what's new.

Only thing worse than a school reunion is a school reunion combined with an under-quality holiday.

These can't be the people I grew up with.

Tom, Sarah, Frankie and George got old. Real old. Tommy got a beer gut. Sarah got a scar! I think I'm the only normal one... Whatever that is in this "Brave new world".

Time to check in I guess...

* * * * *

I want to go home.

The room is tiny and filthy. A cleaner left mine as I came, and it was fucking attrocious.

He SAID he was a cleaner...

And now this. A paella that looks like it was made about 2 weeks ago. Oh, and a salad. A big Salad. I saw someone throwing veg into a lawnmower when I got here. No need to wonder why now.

If I don't get to somewhere with a clean floor and good food soon, I think I'll kill myself. I'd even settle for a Mcdonalds. It's that bad.

God this smells horrible. It's either this or there's a gas leak.

Down the hatch.

* * * * *

Huurgh...

OhgodI'mgonnabe...

*HORK*

I can't...

Can... Breathe...

Haagh...

*Thumph*

* * * * *

Hah!

Where... What happened?

At least I'm feeling better...

That's right... That fucking food. I'm gonna sue them into the next millenium.

...God I'm thirsty. At least I checked the water, and it seems pretty...

W...What's wrong with my eyes.

I have brown eyes, not... Not Purple.

Violet, not purple.

Gah! My hands!

Violet rings around my hands... My finger...

They feel like they're on fire.

...This is a joke. A bloody joke. I was moaning too much, so they all...

...They won't wash off. The water is ice cold...

Or are my hands... Sensitive. Overly sensitive. I can feel everything... I...

I'm gonna be sick...

*SHINK!*

The fucking toilet! It just... Fell apart!

No... Where i put my hands on it... They slid off, I had no grip...

The rings...

The cuts are where the rings were...

...

What could have...

I refuse to believe that paella could do this. No matter how toxic.

I'm... A superhero. I could be a superhero!

...

If I weren't kneeling down in toilet water and shattered bowl.

And I have 13 days left in this... This fucking country.

Great.

Scattered Messages.

LOG OF SAN FORREDO AUDIOSCOPE.
POS: 55-16V 35-03H

AM1:28
MESSAGE BEGINS:
He... Hello?
I...Is anyone ...round?
MESSAGE ENDS.

AM1:47
MESSAGE BEGINS:
I... lost...
Lost a part...
apart...
MESSAGE ENDS.

AM2:09
MESSAGE BEGINS:
...ick.
I ca... ...eel my legs.
Can't see.
...e took my...

...

HARRKH!
MESSAGE ENDS.

POS: 55-16V 84-03H

AM2:14
MESSAGE BEGINS:
Need more...
...ore *STATIC*

...

Somewhere close...
MESSAGE ENDS.

POS: 12-16V 84-12H

AM3:40
Tor-Gils...
Dang...

...as to be c...
Nee... ... ...et him!

Un... ...3e#. S...ch ...Local ...etoid.
MESSAGE ENDS.

AM 5:19
INTERNAL MICROPHONE.

Who are you?

*STATIC*

Why are you here?

*STATIC*

I don't know him. He isn't on this planet.

*STATIC*

He isn't! Even if he is we don't know where he is. It's a big planet.

*STATIC*

[GRINDING, HIGH PITCH WHINING, FREQUENCY HOWLING]

*STATIC*

Please, you have to believe me, we are not hiding him. Search and you won't find him!

*STATIC*

...

Internal Log of Thomas Long.
I have just made contact with an alien life form, some kind of autonomous robot, but it seemed bio-

MESSAGE ENDS.

In the Name of the Father.

No child grows up wanting to be a priest.

I didn't. I wanted to be a race car driver - Just like my dad.

It takes a deeper understandng of the world around you for you to even decide whether religion in general is right for you.

I could never understand, as a kid, why some people went to church on a Sunday, while we all lay around in bed.

It takes a real crisis to shake someone around like that...

I'm not ashamed of my father. He was a good man, and I know that isn't through rose tinted glasses. He did good work for people who didn't have the chances he did. Always out at the poorhouse serving out soup - as archaic as that seems now, it was the thing to do back then.

I never felt like he was just going through the motions for good karma, or to pay for some former mistake. He enjoyed it. He loved seeing the people's smiling faces.

They all said he was taken away from us too early. I couldn't understand what had happened. My dad was a hero - the fastest man on the track. I later understood that speed has its risks. He'd hit a corner. Literally - his brakes failed and he hit it. Dead on arrival.

I was too young then to get it. It wasn't until...

Until... Mom died.

Mom was a saint. My Dad always called her that. She was a teacher's aide. Worked at one of those inner city schools. She got an award from the district comission for all of her good work. Never hurt a fly.

She got caught in an armed robbery. It went sour.

Again, I was ignorant to the reasons why.

The pastor tried to explain it to me. I wouldn't listen.

It's times like this - sat behind the wheel of a car - that I think about everything that's happened to me. How far from those times I've come.

Because it's the last time I could ever think about them.

It's like he used to say...

"Driving is he biggest thrill you could ever feel. A mixture of sharp-eyed focus and dead-eyed relaxation. There's nohting like it on earth."

I don't think he knew how right he was.

But there's something he forgot to mention.

When you hear the engine roar under your feet, you feel like the king of the world. You forget about everything. It just becomes a huge blur.

I'm gonna sleep well tonight. For once.

Riverside Regrets.

"Is this... Really... Neccesary?"

"Seemingly. You pissed the old man off something fierce last night."

"But... You weigh a ton!"

"Are you gonna keep bitching all the way around?"

"Haha... Says the guy... sitting on my shoulders."

"Did you say shitting?"

"No... Dumbass."

"I'm still pretty pissed off actually."

"Why?"

"Why?! You were gonna quit."

"I have... My reasons."

"Like what? This is your dream, man."

"I know... But I can't... Take it anymore."

"It?"

"Him."

"Oh. He's strict out of love - you're like a son to him."

"Fathers don't beat their sons, Jack."

"They do."

"With folding chairs? Fireballs? He threw... His shoe at me."

"Last night was hectic, but you surprised him. He didn't know how you felt."

"How was he... After I left..."

"Break time. 3 minutes. He was quiet. Went to his room, didn't come out till you got back. He looked tired - all red in the eyes."

"Really?"

"Joel, he wants to pass the legacy on to you."

"...What?"

"The mask, licences, tights, the works. Even says you can use the moves, or make variations, you know how protective the pros are of their gimmick. This is a huge fucking deal."

"...I can't."

"Why not?!"

"...I've been offered a job in the states."

"Oh. For who?"

"Who do you think? They've been on a talent drive for months now."

"They're bringing you back in? Will you be Joey Farraday again?"

"No. They've promiced to repackage me. Still Joey but without the irish."

"...You're gonna break his heart."

"Stop it."

"He loves you. He wants to see you reach the top, it's the only thing keeping him going."

"I know."

"Then..."

"I don't know why! I'm just sick of this fucking country. Everything is a legacy - the old guys keeping themselves at the top while we make the midcard all shiney for Hosei-san to look at his reflection in while he counts the cash - the cash we don't even see!"

"We knew what we were getting into - Gaijin faction, highway to success, the high and hard road."

"Then why after 2 years are we still running laps around this resevoir?"

"...We have to keep in shape. You know that. You also have a pretty cushy path to success in front of you, and yet you want to throw it back in the old man's face to go back to GWA as a fucking jobber to the stars. Same shit - different package."

"..."

"I just don't get why you can't be happy with what you have. Every man needs a dream, but you're living it - you're so close to the top and you're gonna give up just bacause it didn't pan out how you wanted it to."

"..."

"..."

"Get on, Jack."

"What?"

"3 minutes are up. We gotta get going again."

"Oh, right."

"Humph... And Thanks. I think I'm gonna talk to Toshogi when we get back. Try and apologise."

"..."

"You're right. And plus, there are good points to this."

"Oh?"

"I can take you to the top with me, Jack Alexandria."

"Just like we said as kids. Jack Alexandria, master manager and his charge - Joel Johaine!"

"Ha. Maybe it'll be..."

* * * * *

IN THE RED CORNER!

WEIGHING IN AT 236lbs!

TOGE MASK!

A True Test of Mettle.

Before we enter the car, I'd like you to show me how you'd check that the brakes are working on the car.

...

N-No! Don't!

What are you thinking?! You could have run into the car behind!

...Tell me how you'd check the lights.

...

No... That's the horn.

There. Good.

You're damn lucky these can only give you a minor.

Now, you know the drill, if I don't give you a direction I want you to go straight.

I'd like you to start the car and turn left at the end of the road.

...

That's a right signal.

And a right turn.

...Fine, I'll just need to switch to course 15...

*TU-TUMPH*

What was that?!

Ah-Oh! Didn't you see the crow?!

Well I realise if it were smart it would have flown away...

Humph. Left at the end.

Next right.

...You just went through a red light. And a pane of glass apparently.

Right.

NO! I was just saying... Well, fine... Number 13 then.

I'm looking over the fact that you just went through a garage to make that right.

Now. Next left.

Pull over here, just before the silver car.

Which one?! There's only one silver car!

Now, I'd like you to do a turn in the road.

...

Why did you get out of the car?

Let's... Let's just go...

Next Right.

WAH! Why didn't you stop for him?! He was right there!

Left at the end.

...

That was a stop junction.

Oh please... Tell me you're not reversing into the road again.

...

Left.

That was right...

Pull over.

I want you to reverse around the corner up ahead.

...

I'm well aware it leads to the demolition site, why do you ask?

There's No Such Thing As Unicorns.

There.

I said it.

Don't believe me?

Look at the platypus.

Old arguement but still - an animal that screwed up is screwed up for a reason. It's not just a singular bit tacked on for effect.

...

Though there ARE narwhals.

Okay... new title.

"There's No Such Thing As PEGASUS."

...Or is it Pegasus' - for the plural...

Fuck it.

"There's No Such Thing As LAMASSU."

Do they even know what a... No.

"There's No Such Thing As THUNDERBIRDS."

First question will be wether I mean the puppets.

"There's No Such Thing As A COCKATRICE."

There. No-one can disprove me now!

With a Yellow Flower.

She loved Yellow.

Always used to see her in yellow. Or with it.

Even tried to talk me into painting the whole damn house yellow.

That was the kind of woman she was.

All I have now are my memories.

I'll always remember Christmas. Every single one.

They were all special.

There was the incident with the turkey. Poor mutt had eyes bigger than his stomach. We had chinese food that night.

Then there was the time we went out for a tree... in the forest. I, as usual got lost. By the time I got back to the car, she was crying her eyes out... We got one from the outer layer, an old looking one. It looked pretty in the light of the fire.

Then there was last year... She was sick. Thought it was just the Flu. Made her chicken soup, said "It's not Turkey but... Close enough.". She laughed.

She didn't get better. Cancer. Even the name sounds like a monster. And you can't even count on genetics.

She had good and bad days. The good days were... good. She was just like she used to be. Picking flowers from the forest everyday. The whole house used to smell of them.

She loved to read. I'd usually see her curled up with some kind of book on the couch. Encyclopedias, mysteries, romance, old service manuals - anything she could get her hands on. She enjoyed reading to me. Her voice was that of an angel.

The bad days were... They were hell. She would lie around, doing nothing. It just wasn't her. I used to look after her, keep her company. She used to put a brave face on it all, but I swear... Sometimes I heard her crying.

She refused treatment of any kind. She thought it was the will of God. That's where we differed - I could never believe in something I cannot see. Her faith was enormous, like her heart. We used to joke about it, and even argue about it. But we never meant any of it.

It was love.

I got back from town one day...

She was lying on the couch...

She was cold.

...

She will stay cold. I cannot live without her. And yet I still exist.

My eyes are dim. My hands hard from crafting our home. I can't remember the last time I had a haircut. I'm numb... Numb from the cold. The touch of winter that keeps her with me.

I still keep a bunch of flowers in the house, though the smell is dull now, in the darkness and the moss.

And I always place one upon her grave. A single yellow flower.

All I have are my memories... But I'm not alone.

She's still here...

Still cold...

A Travelling Tale.

There once was a man in Cornwall,
Whose wild oats he wanted to sprall.
He got on a boat,
With a 50 pound note,
And soon he looked at the Great Wall.

He stayed at a sleezy hotel,
He couldn't get over the smell.
With flowers and wine,
He tried hard to dine,
But alas 'cause the noise hurt as well.

Downtrodden he went out to walk,
But knew he could not talk the talk.
A beautiful beau,
A promise but 'lo,
They young lady still had a "Stalk".

He got on the boat yet again,
But this time he came out in Spain.
The sights and the sounds,
turned him round and around,
In Pamplona he felt a great pain.

After the bills were all paid,
He went off to where he would stay.
A nice 5-star villa,
With plenty of dinner,
He went out on the town for some play.

He met a young dancing girl,
Whose skin was a smooth as a pearl.
Her hair flowing brown,
Going all the way down,
'Cross her as she did twist and twirl.

He struck up a lame conversation,
mixed the words for Hotel and for Station.
She smiled with glee,
And then so did he,
But Rome was his new destination.

In the shadow of the Leaning Tower.
He managed to rest for an hour.
Lulled into sleep.
The pickpockets did creep.
The situation for him was now sour.

He went to the local Police,
And was served by a Cop called Denise.
They hit it off well,
A date came with "Farewell!".
He did think that his luck had increased.

He met her at a small cafe,
and together the passion did sway.
She picked up the bill,
And they both felt a thrill,
To her love nest they did both away.

Engrossed in each other all night,
Like a Princess and gallant White Knight.
The end came around,
with a chorus of sound,
It was truly like love at first sight.

Now this was a cautionary tale,
For we know that this voyage did fail.
Why? you do ask,
There's a fact I did mask.
The man had a wife! Name of Gail.

There Once was a Man...

There once was a man from Dunfries,
Who caught quite a bad case of Fleas.
He scratched and he cried,
But whatever he tried,
The bugs were all quite hard to please.

There once was a man from Seattle,
Who was known 'cause his dentures did rattle.
It was quite a mistake,
To order the steak,
Trying to talk o'er the noise was a battle.

There once was a gal in Maine,
Whose life had become such a strain.
A short length of rope,
A suicide note,
She had found her solution to pain.

There once was a boy in Berlin,
Who awoke to a bed full of skin.
He peeled and he poked,
And this isn't a joke,
Without it he was ever so thin.

There once was a man in Japan,
Who felt that he needed a tan.
He hired a bed,
But he didn't turn red,
He knew when to quit with the plan.

A Joke.

A first-grade class arrives back from summer break to a new teacher.

"Good Morning children" he says. "I am Mr. Running Wolf, and I'm a native american".

The children are facinated as he tells them his story, until the principal's voice booms over the tannoy:

"Announcements after the pledge of allegence."

Moments later in the next classroom, Tammy, one of Mr. Running Wolf's children runs in and yells:

"OH GOD! HELP US! HE'S GONE CRAZY!"

The teacher runs to the next room, finding Mr. Running Wolf covered in blood along with several scalped children.

"Mr. Running Wolf! What are you doing?!".

"Under God?! MY GOD IS A WENDIGO!".

And with that he hacks a tomahawk into the other teacher's forehead.

...

If you were a native american, you'd have found that funny.

Dancer's Fire.

I dance for them.

This is my life.

I move my body for impure reasons.

These steps I make are the opposite to how I feel.

I don't feel passionate. I'm not in love. I do not wish to seduce these men.

I feel angry.

I feel dirty.

But His Majesty demands that I dance.

They grope me. Touching me in ways a man should not touch a woman who is not his wife.

They...

They will burn.

My curse is to dance in despair.

Not for much longer though.

My last dance awaits.

My rage. My power. My soul. They will fuel my body, driving me on to oblivion.

None of them will leave the palace alive.

We will all feel the tongues of Hell, burning across every nerve.

I welcome this pain...

It will be the only thing I will feel, and the last.

The Briefing.

I don't know what they told you, but being a part of this unit isn't a walk in the park.

Sometimes, you'll be in the face of death. You be able to see the grim reaper's brains through those eye sockets.

You're what makes him tick.

That being said - If you don't fuck up, this won't happen. And we aren't in the buisness of sending our boys on a suicide mission.

This is a trial by fire for you newbies.

For the benefit of the older boys - This is Evans, Hannah, Jaskey and Foal.

Foal is coming to us from the S.A.S. - All the way from jolly ol' England.

Welcome to the club, boys. You're all Hawks now.

Onto new business.

We've recieved a private request from a shareholder in the unit - A Mr. Armin Salisman. When an investor asks for help, we oblige - Bullets don't buy themselves.

He's an oil tycoon, and a big believer in the war industry. He owns one of the largest oilfields in the world. He's been recieving death threats recently, along with terrorist attacks on the fields he owns. Obviously someone drives an electric car.

He wants us to catch them in the act, then give whoever's in charge a shakedown. He wants to avoid any kind of confrontation if nessecary. IF. He's never gonna know if the guy gave up or not.

We move out at 0600. Details on the ride over.

Fall out.

Life of a Modern Monster.

Ho-hum...

God I'm bored...

Sod all to do...

Just sit in my cave and think...

Grandpa was right - Monsterin' was better in the old days.

People respected you.

Feared you.

But thanks to grindhouse - People aren't scared by monsters...

That and Godzilla - Uppity motherfucker... One little movie and it all goes to his head.

I liked Biolante - She was a good cook.

But I just sit in my hole... Waiting...

Not much call for a dragon-cobra... Let alone a 200ft long one.

I'm the biggest one of the new breed...

Just sitting... Waiting...

Wouldn't mind a battle once in a while...

I'd even fight the Power Rangers... Whatever the theme - Bugs, Lamps, VD's - Any of them.

I'd kill myself... but I have no arms...

I'd even watch Dharma and Greg...

But I just have to sit here... And wait.

...

Smog monster. I'd get work as a smog monster...

Or a Giant Bug...

Or even a Rock Monster...

Rockies get all the chicks.

Especially the Rocs...

Ha...

I shoulda been a comedian...

The Outside Bet.

*KA-HACK*

Oh god... I'm under the heel today...

Wasn't meant to be this quick...

Just today...

Just gotta get through today...

They're all counting on me...

Gotta be ready...

*HURK*

* * * * *

Freddy...

Freddy...

W...Who's there?

It's me, Freddy...

No...

Yes... I'm getting out, Freddy... I'll be free...

Hah...

Free... free to eat my fill... Eat your wife...

No! Please... Gillman... Stop it.

You thought you could hold me down? Wrong.

Urrgh...

Thought you could suppress me? I'm you! This is your true nature...

...

The beast within...

...

Embrace it... Feel the blood in your veins bubble and flow...

NO!

* * * * *

Aagh!

*TRORK* Scales! You alright?!

*Click*

Yeah... I'm... I'm OK.

You sure man? I tried to reach you an-

I'm fine! What's the situation topside?

Still waiting on DNA. He was meant to be here an hour ago.

Plan still the same?

Drive him into the sewer? Yeah. You got the Fracamite?

Yeah.

Good. I dunno how Shape got it, but it... It fucks him up.

Right. Just hold it out. Got it.

You sound off, man.

Just a little nervous.

You'll be fine.

Thanks Mac.

Over and out. *TRORK*

...

Huurgh... I'm gonna throw up.

* * * * *

Gotta be ready... The shit hit the fan.

Sound like a real battle up there. I can hear Mac thumping away.

Need to focus...

There!

Take this you fu-

*DUMPH*

* * * * *

...

...No...ake it..

...les!

...Et him to...

...E wa...Ick...

...Acami... For hi...

...

...

* * * * *

1 in 6...

5 in 6...

There is always the chance of either neither or even both happening.

It's miniscule.

Am I lucky?

To be alive, yes...

I'm a brain in a jar...

A jar full of Fracamite. Keeping me alive.

They couldn't have known.

The combination of radiation from the Toxic waste... And the unstable Fracamite... Made me...

...A daddy.

Did you know some fish can be asexual? And some can change gender?

They're deep though... Like the kind science hasn't disected yet...

My body was changing... But couldn't keep up... It died...

But I live on. Me and my children.

Why bother to name them? They all look the same...

Louise would throw a shit fit if she knew...

If she wasn't told I'd died on the battlefield...

It's just me and the swarm... living on...

They look at me with hungry eyes... But I'm in control of the beast that made them into the vicious little piranhas they are...

Just me and the beast...

And Then You Fry.

Hi there, Gary.

Uh... Who are you?

I'm the Devil. Name's Bezour.

Isn't it usually Satan?

I have many names, but Bezour is the real one. You'd be surprised what the bible got wrong.

So... I'm in hell.

Yeah, that's the short answer.

What's the long answer?

You're in the 3rd circle of hell, reserved for those who didn't meet any of their life goals.

...That's awfully spesific.

That's the whole thing with Hell. Another thing you mortals got wrong.

Hell is built upon life goals?

So is Heaven. If you meet all of your life goals, you get in.

...I don't get it.

Okay... Hm... Take Abe Lincoln, he met his goals. He became President and Freed the slaves. Those goals were kinda linked together. But they can be anything.

So even if I'd met 7 out of 8 goals, I'd still be sent here?

Well, that would have put you i the 1st circle. They have an appeal process. After serving enough time to make up for the missed goals.

...What were my goals?

Hm... Says here you were meant to set the land speed record.

Wha?! I can't even remember ever wanting to do that!

Really? It's a part of your fate, meaning it could have...

Well... I did like go-karts as a kid...

What changed?

I broke my arm when I crashed my first kart. Made it all on my own. After that I didn't want to risk it again...

Which is what lead you to study hard and eventually become the CEO of a multi-national software company.

...Yeah.

Moving on. After that you were meant to have a loving family. Wife and 3 kids.

I did have a family. But I just had 2 kids.

But it wasn't with your one true love.

...Tabitha?

Tabitha Green. Your high school sweetheart.

We only went out once!

But she enjoyed it. As did you. Why you never called her back I don't know.

Neither do I...

Then you were meant to do charity work with underpriviledged kids. Setting up some kind of inner city go-kart league.

...I never would have done that.

Me neither.

Lastly you were meant to give your son a father/son talk that would have set hm on the right track.

What would he have done?

No idea. Can't see the destiny of unborn people.

Well, what can you see?

Just that he would have wasted his life if he hadn't gotten a good talking to.

Oh...

There we go.

What?

Thats the 3rd circle. The circle of regret. And you're gonna be here forever.

God...

He can't help you.

So what now?

You sit here. You could get up and walk around. You can talk to other people in the circle. It's freedom. Do whatever you like. I've got a vietnamese woman to greet. She was meant to adopt an orphan or something.

Okay.

...

Land speed record, huh? That would been... hm.

Jailbreak.

"Listen up. Shape put me in charge, so you're both gonna have to do as I say TO THE LETTER. Understood?"

"Crystal."

"What about you Tektile?"

"FINE."

"Good."

Went better than I anticipated. For now. Why even think it's going to go well - Fate'll fuck up up the ass.

"Ridgeback, I need you to dig-"

"You're kidding. A tunnel?! That won't work - it's way too far and we won't be able to breach the foundations."

"...Let me finish."

Why didn't Shape just give us a plan. Oh I know... He wants me to fuck up.

"Dig UNDER the fence."

"Oh..."

"Yeah. Then we're gonna take it easy. Get across the courtyard and in through the door straight ahead."

Big mistake using an old minimum pen as a deep six facility.

"THEN WHAT? WE DONT EXACTLY FIT IN."

"Thats when we start breaking things. We just need to make it to the east wing. That's where Zero is."

"And Gangland?"

"...Zero will be able to get us down to the next floor. He's in 273."

"Right."

"WHAT SECURITY MEASURES ARE THERE?"

"Hang on, Shape and Downtime gave me some... There. The schematics say its basic on this level - just patrol points and the odd foam turret."

"The lower floors?"

"As I said, That'll be a breeze with-"

Searchlights?! We've been here too long!

*INTRUDER ALERT - LOCKDOWN HAS BEEN INITIATED."

"Shit! Break the fence!"

"What about the plan?!"

"New plan - Break it down!"

"HAHAHA! TAKE THIS!"

Should have expected this. Outer ring security said searchlights. Why I didn't go over the plan on the ride over is beyond me. No time to think now... Gotta go!

* * * * *

EAST WING

* * * * *

"Hah... Hah... Tek..."

"YES?!"

"W...Where's Ridge?"

"LAST I SAW HE WAS GOING WILD OUT IN THE YARD."

"Shit."

"ZERO?"

"Yeah, gotta stick to the plan."

Yeah... That worked SO well last time.

"WHERE IS HE?"

"Room 588"

"HANG ON."

"Woah!"

"FIFTH FLOOR. EIGHTY-EIGHTH ROOM."

"...Thanks."

"I'LL KEEP WATCH."

Been a long time since I picked a lock... Just... Like riding... AH! Done it.

*BANG!*

"GET ZERO, THESE ARE MINE!"

Said like a true nutball...

"Zero?"

"What time is it?"

"Uh..."

"I haven't got a watch. What time is it?"

"About 10 after 2"

"AM?"

"...Yeah."

"You tend to lose track of time after spending your life in a 5.2 by 5.1 box..."

...I'm surrounded by insanity. Be it psycho or just plain gone in the head. But anyone would go after spending... God knows how long in this place. It's a living hell.

"Come on, we're getting you out of he..."

"Who's we?"

Me an..."

Shit. The Warden.

Warden was Deadlock, a vigilante with a chain fetish. Urban legend. Guy was an animal when he got you. Even Shape was caught once. He got caught for murder a while back - the rumours were true, he's the Warden now. If you can't kill a man, you make him into your weapon.

"This yours?"

*THONK*

Tektile's... Oh god.

"I suppose you want to get out of here."

"Here's hoping."

"How do you think that's gonna happen?"

"Frankly, after tonight - I'm just gonna go with the GROW!"

Go with the grow? Urrgh... I need to stop saying stupid shit. I need to stop talking period. Gets me into WAY too much trouble.

Just got enough of a growth spurt to toss the Warden around like a ragdoll. But that's not gonna stop him.

...But maybe this will!

*...THUD!*

Watch that first step. It's a doozy.

"Come on, we've got another guest to check out..."

STOP TALKING.

"Hold on, kid."

"What are you?"

"Just shaking off the cobwebs."

*CLICK... THUNGTHUNGTHUNGTHUNG...*

He unlocked the doors to the rest of the cells. Just by looking at them... Remind me never to piss him off.

"Just enough of a distraction. Where are we headed now?"

"Basement 1. 273."

"Gangland, eh? Strength in numbers I bet..."

"Let's get moving."

* * * * *

BASEMENT 1

* * * * *

"Here."

*CLICK... THUNG.*

"Thanks."

He's hooked up to a still drip. Only way to keep a guy like him down.

"We need to get him up and out."

"We don't have much time. I have an idea."

"Zero!"

"We need reinforcements. Replacements. I know a couple of guys. just flick the switch and head for the door. I'll meet you in the yard."

"Wait!"

Gone. Damn it. If I head back without these two, it'll be my head...

...And? So what? Shape wants you dead anyway. You could just leave now, head for an island somewhere and forget about this fiasco.

But what about Carol. She'd be left behind. Thrown to the wolves. I... I can't do that to her.

*TIK*

He'll be awake soon enough. I'd be safer carrying him out of here.

"Up we go..."

* * * * *

THE YARD

* * * * *

Gotta go. He's back up. Knew it wouldn't keep him down.

*CHI-LUN*

The chain! it's red hot!

"YAAH!"

"He's down, Warden"

"Get a chem-crew out here. Double dose for the giant here."

*THOOM!*

Wha... Zero?

"Yaagh!"

"Simms! ...Zero."

"I'm not alone, Warden. You remember Wild Fang and Forceshock, don't you?"

"Damn... Shit."

"We're going now. We need the fresh air. Force, grab the kids."

Urrgh... God, I've never felt this bad... Woah, this guy... Telekinetic. Shake it off. Need to get

them to the harbour.

"Fang. Sick 'em."

*YAIGH!*

"Aaigh! Oh god!"

"Hey kid. Where are we going."

"Harbour..."

"Right. Force - Harbour."

"Got it, Z..."

"Grab Fang."

*ARF?!*

Ah... ahahaha... These guys... It's the Damacles Pact. I'm in safe...

* * * * *

THE SILK DAGGER

* * * * *

Urgh. Where am...

Oh... The boat. We made it.

"Looks like you're awake."

"Zero?"

"I'm sorry about your friends."

"I'm not..."

"Heh."

"So this Shape guy... He's the boss?"

"Yeah... You met-"

"Yeah. He was pissed. But when he saw Force and Fang, he mellowed out. Told you I'd get some

good replacements."

"The Damacles pact."

"The inevitable sword of injustice. The band's back together."

"You gonna stick around?"

"Got no choice really. Doctor Judgement is long dead."

Doctor Judgement... Their nemesis. Died in the Farstrong Invasion. Saved the world...

"We thought we'd stick around and give you guys a hand. We know the plan."

"Alright..."

"Get some sleep."

...

"He up for visitors?"

"No... Just slipped off again."

"Why do you care, Zero?"

"I guess I see a little of myself in him. He staggered Deadlock, that's a feat in itself."

"Ours isn't a caring buisness. We help each other, but we're all tools in a greater scheme."

"...And where do you fit into that scheme, Shape?"

"I'm merely a small cog in a greater engine. An engine of chaos. Let me know when he's up

again."

"Right..."

...

"An engine of chaos. But who desires to be in control?"

He Gets Shit Done.

BANG!

You're dead, bitch.

That's right. It's me. Action Dave - The one and only.

Often imitated, never replicated.

In the flesh.

Thought your little crew did away with me in Bangladesh? WRONG!

Never send a boy to do a man's job.

And NEVER kill a man in his sleep. If he's hardcore, you won't even know the difference.

Nice touch with the ninjas though.

But even a group of deadly assassins can't beat the deadliest man on the planet.

And your little boyfriend, Darren Anger. Tried attacking attacking me on the plane to Tibet.

He's got a lot to be angry about now, what with having no legs. Or a head.

Went out of the sewage pipes with the rest of the shit.

Ha.

I've beaten Nazis. HEIL ACTION!

Wizards. ZAPP!

And even the Mythical Nog-goblins. That's right.

The only enemy I've never beaten is my crippling illiteracy...

But that doesn't matter now. Words sting, But a bullet kills!

*BANG!*

Now to stop the doomsday device and call HQ. No doubt they'll call me a maverick like always and-

-Who's there?!

Who are you, Little Girl?! Another of Syke's hitmen?!

...My... My daughter?

LIES! True, I've slept with many women, But I've been careful - I killed them all afterwards for being commnist scum!

...Paris? 1974?

...Marie.

I still don't believe you!

Test results? Give them here...

...

...

...

I CAN'T READ!

*boom*

Jukebox Memories.

All life begins with "Ode to Joy". No matter who the person becomes or is raised by.

All Life ends with a requiem. Dependant upon the soul.

Everyone has 10 songs they remember for the rest of their life:

Baa Baa Black Sheep - My mother sang this to me.

Rebel Yell - The first song I truly remember hearing on the radio.

Wannabe - The song everyone hates to remember singing to.

Scarborough Fair - That one song you always remember your first love to. Painful memories.

Like a Prayer - From the darker times.

Girls just wanna have fun - The cherry popper.

Dragula - The recently surfaced rebel added this to the list.

Perfect day - Played at the funeral of my parents. Quite the reverse for me.

Goodbye Horses - The slippery slope.

The Frog Chorus - That one song you play to forget what you've just done and escape to another world.

Some forget these songs.

Not me.

Music is my life. My Reason to exist.

It just isn't for everyone else.

There are arguements. Names are called, punches thrown. I never win in the physical world.

But as the spirit of music - I teach them my lessons.

They fight at first.

Broken bars and dropped notes meet their screams.

They have to sing in tune!

For my Magnum Opus!

The cries of death are the sweetest song...

...

I digress.

I don't see why they don't get it. Even the simplest things. I love music. I get that others don't share my love, we're human, we'd all be clones if we were the same.

But they openly challenge me.

It's my opinion!

I respect that yours are different to mine.

Don't rub it in.

Then why do I do it?

Why do I try to teach them?

Because of her...

Melody.

My true love.

She's always there when I need her.

She cheers me up when I'm sad.

She loves me unconditionally.

She wants to hear them sing with me...

Win or lose... Sink or swim... One thing is certain we'll never give in... Arm in arm... Hand in hand... We all stand together...

A Bad Case of Shingles.

Scales has always been reliable. Ever since I've known him, he's been prompt, resourceful and best of all - A team player.

Not to say any of the other guys aren't. But they'd sell each other down the river on the turn of a literal dime.

Rumble, Downtime, The Calamity Twins, and Big Jack. All trustworthy, up to a point. Jack more than the rest, he doesn't speak.

But something's wrong. Scales isn't looking so hot. Big black rings around his eyes, he's hacking up a storm whenever he speaks, and... I dunno, he just looks a little off colour.

Think I'll collar him at some point... Gotta be after the meeting though.

"Ladies and Gentlemen. Thank you all for coming."

Shape - Magnificent Bastard. Can heal any injury, and do things with his body you wouldn't believe.

"You know why we're here - You just wanna know who and/or what we're after."

Shape never plans for the small time. This'll be good.

"Pilgrim."

Whoa. The Pilgrim is a legend. Guy doesn't age. Super strong, super fast and feels no pain. Doesn't mean he can't be beaten though.

"DNA."

Deadly New Adversary. A rookie? Sure, he's caused a few problems but he's just a morpher - small scale shapeshifter. Just tough.

"And Rainy Forrest."

...Really? She's a fucking joke. She's a plant girl. All she can do is grow plants and spit poison. She retired years ago after... Well. The Gangland Incident. Heard she's a P.I. now.

"I know what you're all thinking. And I just need you to trust me. These people are gonna make waves in the next... 2-3 years."

How does he know?

...Scales ain't lookin' so hot.

Unlike the blonde at the front... Must be a rookie. Haven't seen her in the rap sheets lately.

"Pilgrim, as we al know is offworld at the moment. Something about the Uranians... God knows we're all sick of hearing about them. He's scheduled to be back on either Thursday or Friday, we still don't have a definative date."

That's odd. Downtime is usually good for the fine details. Guy works hard.

"When he's back, the Justice Alliance-"

Stupid name.

"-Are sending the rest of the big names out there to take his place for the weekend, to keep control of the situation."

That's... That can't be right. Thats a HUGE oversight on the part of the J.A. They usually only send 2 of the 10 out to assist in a situation. Something must be up. But then again, the 10 haven't been seeing eye to eye recently - 4 of them have quit after some huge conspiracy. Feh, just makes them easier to get at.

"And that leaves Pilgrim all alone in the tower in Washington."

Nice.

"As for DNA and Forrest - We're gonna just have fun wih them. We found out DNA's weakness, and Rainy is still hurtin' after the attack on Chicago by Reaver."

God bless Reaver. Mindless War machine that gets out of his prison every so often - I wonder how he got out last time, heh heh.

"Until Pilgrim gets back. We're gonna be busy with the small timers."

Seems kind of a waste if you ask me. Sort of pointless.

"Thanks to Ms. Mind over here, We'll be bolstering the ranks - If you get what I'm saying."

...Hahahahahahahaha. You ...Magnificent Bastard. A brainwasher.

"She's gonna open them up to their true potential. They're gonna be our shock troops against Pilgrim."

It's perfect.

...Still, I can't see what he meant about them making waves. Unless he can see the future, which is highly probable in our line of work, he has no way of knowing that. Just contradicted myself. In my own mind. Great.

"As for all of you, you'll all be playing the parts to which you are accustomed."

Which for me is Offense. You need a lot of offense to take on a Cape. Me, Rumble, John, Cash Calamity and Tektile, the power-armoured psychopath are on the front line. Jane Calamity, Scales and Solaris on defence. Downer and Shape usually watch from a distance, telling us joe schmoes what to do... Reminds me, need to get my earpiece fixed.

"Special orders for Ridgeback, Tektile and Macro."

Oh?

"You're gonna break someone out of Grayline. Two people actually."

Grayline. That's the freezer - place where the worst of the worst go.

"You're getting Mr. Zero and Gangland out of cold storage."

...Gangland. No. You can't do that. It's just not done. Girl went through enough with that thug-life freak. Gangland isn't talked about anymore for good reason - He has the power to take down a whole army, and he uses it to... She was defenceless.

And Zero? He's just gonna be for collateral damage. Zero controls luck. Makes it so those against him have zero chance to hit him. Good weapon, but he's nuts. A certain rampage through N.Y.C. was the reason he went into Grayline.

"Macro, I'm gonna need you to lead that one. You head out tomorrow night, I'll call you and we'll meet up beforehand."

...He bloody knows I'm not up for it. He's tying me to it.

"That goes for everyone too, I'll gather you all up next week before the first event so we can go through the plan. Just get some rest over the weekend"

...If I don't do it, I'll be sole reason for our failurAnd even if we succeed, I'll still be a pariah.

Fuck.

Gotta catch Scales.

"Hey Scales!"

"Macro..."

"You look like shit."

"You could say that."

"What's the story?"

"Took a hit from TLC. Bad hit."

Shit. TLC means Toxic Love Child. Punk asian heroine. Can turn into toxic waste. Hot, but deadly.

"You're fucking sick?"

"Worse than that."

"How much worse?"

"Dunno. The Doc says I'm either gonna mutate or... Die, basically."

"What are the chances of mutation?"

"1 in 6."

"That's pretty high."

"Here's hoping. The rest of the 6 is for the other possibility."

"Ah."

"Yeah."

"...So, what do you think of all this?"

"Screwed up."

"Hm."

"I mean - We're going after a god, a rookie and a fucking vegetable."

"I know..."

"And your job, man. Letting those freaks out."

"I'm not a happy bunny."

"I've gotta go man."

"Wanna meet up at the weekend? Carol's still saying we need to double date."

"Alright. Providing I'm not dead."

"Same here."

...

Worst comes to worst, he's gonna be a one man feeding frenzy out there.

Maybe... Nah.

...Well. The doc was the one who gave him his chances. Maybe he'd have something to... Speed up the process.

Everyone has their job. One person fails and the whole thing usually goes askew.

Teach him to make me a fucking scapegoat.